I need to talk

[natenator]

If a relationship is going to be that much work is it really worth it?? he says he hasnt been feeling it for 2 years, so lets be real and call this a 4 year relationship with 2 years of being there because its comfortable, love should be easy, personalitys should work together, i dont think any couple should have to work overly hard to be in love, its just not worth it IMHO. Love should come naturally

Ask Faller. Dude has been married for EONS and has had issues during that time and am sure there were periods that weren't all that rosey.

If you want to look at something not being worth it when the going gets tough then you will be single for the rest of your life. You want an easy life it seems. Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight.

Relationships go through periods of being in love. You cant be running hot all the time. It's just not possible. But being in love and loving someone are very different things.

[Big D]

thanks everyone for the replies, this helps so much.
we're going to talk tonight. she wants to work things out, I just dont see how we can work things out. but I will try

counciling is a great Idea, i will keep it in mind, but we're both still very young and i dont see at as wasting 6 years. I guess what i'm trying to say is i feel like I need a new start.

[natenator]

thanks everyone for the replies, this helps so much.
we're going to talk tonight. she wants to work things out, I just dont see how we can work things out. but I will try

counciling is a great Idea, i will keep it in mind, but we're both still very young and i dont see at as wasting 6 years. I guess what i'm trying to say is i feel like I need a new start.

We ALLLLLL go through that dude. Every single one of us do. As the years get on, shit gets more routine and boring. Life takes over.

That's why things take work and effort.

BTW: I'm not saying I am good at what I preach. I just know these things SHOULD be done. I am not so great at doing them myself lol

[waderow]

We ALLLLLL go through that dude. Every single one of us do. As the years get on, shit gets more routine and boring. Life takes over.

That's why things take work and effort.

BTW: I'm not saying I am good at what I preach. I just know these things SHOULD be done. I am not so great at doing them myself lol

agreed

all relationships take work, and those that think they dont have never been in one, and/or are too young to know anything about serious relationships.

People are all too quick to say "dump her" and "if its that much trouble, leave her".... I chuckle because I am sure these guys at home are either alone, or 20 years old and still chasing bar sluts.

6 years is a long time, and to throw that away in my eyes would require cheating. Nothing else could cause that relationship to be regarded as lost with out a fight. See a counselor. She want it to work, and I think you should too. When this can be overcome, you will find yourself closer then ever with this girl, and the little things will become trivial.

[ironwill]

agreed

all relationships take work, and those that think they dont have never been in one, and/or are too young to know anything about serious relationships.

People are all too quick to say "dump her" and "if its that much trouble, leave her".... I chuckle because I am sure these guys at home are either alone, or 20 years old and still chasing bar sluts.

6 years is a long time, and to throw that away in my eyes would require cheating. Nothing else could cause that relationship to be regarded as lost with out a fight. See a counselor. She want it to work, and I think you should too. When this can be overcome, you will find yourself closer then ever with this girl, and the little things will become trivial.

More true advice.....I see us older (not old) memebers here believe the same things, yet when i was in my teens and 20s, id say screw it as well, i was a male HO at one point for a long while....
All relationships require work, yes love does come naturally, but let me say, there is times where it gets routine and times when a couple just needs to sit down and chat, make sure their goals and aspirations are in line....Make sure they both feel respected and admired by their counterparts...Just do a good old relationship check, and chat....

[daande]

Its like my ex and I we dated for 4 years. The first time we broke up I suggested we goto counseling because I didnt wanna throw 4 years away over a few small things. She didnt want to because shes didnt want to work at it. So 4 months later we got back together then after dating again for 4 months or so I told her off and I will never look back. Moral of the story put the effort in during round 1 so that way you know forsure or not if you want to be with her.

[natenator]

Its like my ex and I we dated for 4 years. The first time we broke up I suggested we goto counseling because I didnt wanna throw 4 years away over a few small things. She didnt want to because shes didnt want to work at it. So 4 months later we got back together then after dating again for 4 months or so I told her off and I will never look back. Moral of the story put the effort in during round 1 so that way you know forsure or not if you want to be with her.

I think your version of the story is a bit distorted but in general I agree with your message.

[daande]

I think your version of the story is a bit distorted but in general I agree with your message.

No its not. I have been dating a new girl for about 2 months now and I have never been treated this good. Even my sister and all my friends like this girl whereas with my ex my sister and a few of my friends hated her.

[natenator]

No its not. I have been dating a new girl for about 2 months now and I have never been treated this good. Even my sister and all my friends like this girl whereas with my ex my sister and a few of my friends hated her.

You told your ex off AFTER your repeated attempts to try and get back together with her and her telling you no. She wanted friends, you wanted more and then after a bit of back and forth you told her off.

[daande]

You told your ex off AFTER your repeated attempts to try and get back together with her and her telling you no. She wanted friends, you wanted more and then after a bit of back and forth you told her off.

No nate she didnt want to be friends. She was ****ing with me she would say she wanted to be friends then the next day wanna go on a date and try to **** me and shit. The girl doesnt know what she wants, hence why she quit a 50k a year job that was a 10 minute drive away from her house for a 32k a year job that is a 45 minute drive away from her house. When I made those posts I was all ****ed up because the girl I did love was ****ing with me so much. I couldn't see it at the time because I loved her so much and I was a retard.

EDIT: One week she would be talking to me about getting a mortgage with me and moving in together and the next week she would want to be friends so eventually I told her off.