I have a girlfriend!!

[twitch]

Hello my internet friends. I know I haven't been around for awhile but I'm back and with good news!! I have a girlfriend. I need your help again as I have a dilema. I don't know what to do.

My girlfriend likes when I kiss her down there between her legs. Well she likes a bit more. Kind of like I have to lick ice cream but she is the ice cream. My problem is that my girlfriend has very dry skin so she showers only 2 times a week. Often she pushes my head down there and says eat. Sometimes it smells real strong. It's a musky odor and it makes me gag a little. When I lick her there and it's on her stronger days, I sometimes get little pieces of hard white things in my mouth. Sometimes I crunch it between my teeth quickly before swallowing it as I don't want to offend her and spit it out. It's been a few times I felt like vomitting but if you guys can make your girlfriend feel special, then so can I. Lately she has been hinting that she wants me to "toss her salad". I don't know what this means. Can you guys please help? Also is there any tricks with those white hard pellet things that come out of her when I lick her?

Thanks.

[St]

Great first post.
Is there a sex thread for this?
BTW tell her to get some skin cream,and go to the doctor for the odor.

[tarnow]

I'm confused. You've been a member for over a year and this is your first post? Lol? I think I'm missing out on something that happened before I joined.

[mcgee]

gross gross gross

[ergie]

Thats just ****ing nasty, is this a joke?

[bigpapapump2016]

definately gotta be a joke, if not, my advice is tell her to take a F**king shower

[gustavo77]

Seriously, I did not need to read that....looking forward to your future posts. :rolleyes:

[The Brick]

lol good ol' twitch, was wondering when you would resurface

[tyler_durden]

It's gotta be a joke cuz thats nasty.

[MIAGIONJUS]

LMAO.... first man that is fukin grose and i am sorry i read that entire paragraph cuz i just puked a little in my mouth. Second i feel sorry for u cuz u have to lick that filthy pussy..... my advice though tell her to wash or no more lovin!

[RJ*]

twitch rules

[Mr.Freeze]

I'm confused. You've been a member for over a year and this is your first post? Lol? I think I'm missing out on something that happened before I joined.

did not miss nothing!Buddy nice post for your first one! Here its a Bodybuilding board i think your at the rong place!!:confused: Admin could you delete this thread PLEASEee

[guest]

did not miss nothing!Buddy nice post for your first one! Here its a Bodybuilding board i think your at the rong place!!:confused: Admin could you delete this thread PLEASEee

lol, he'll grow on ya. nice to see you back twitch. how are the work outs going? those guys still picking on you:D

[slick rick]

There are some classic twitch posts out there. You shouldn't let this one go twitch she sounds like a keeper.

[The Brick]

Twitch has been around a real long time.
Check out some of his posts on MN, real classics lol

[St]

Twitch has been around a real long time.
Check out some of his posts on MN, real classics lol


I will.lol

[mandarb11]

Bro I hope to hell this is a joke, otherwise you must be a 12 year old boy and shouldn't be on these forums anyways.

[BolicPower]

Thats' gross.

[Mr.Freeze]

Twitch has been around a real long time.
Check out some of his posts on MN, real classics lol

i hope his post are not always as funny as this one!!!

[leeroy]

Can someone bring over some of the posts??

[bigdaddydrew123]

suddenly my relationship problems seem insignificant, great way to break the ice twitch, but you should be more direct dont beat arround the bush, pardon pun.

[Sniven]

i hope his post are not always as funny as this one!!!


+1

[gustavo77]

Can someone bring over some of the posts??

Haha, please tell me that you are joking...

[applesauce]

twitch for the winnnnnnnn. bangbangbangbangbangbang

good to see you bro, i miss reading your stories

[waderow]

lol funny story.
if it were real, I would love to get the reaction after the salad tossing episode.... NASTY

[shithead]

so.....where'd he go?

[TheBigStink]

so.....where'd he go?

he's like the poke-a-roo. only chance meetings.

[shithead]

yep

[twitch]

Why is it when I fart under the covers, I like to lift the cover and take a deep sniff. I am sure I am not the only one here who likes the smell of my own farts? Anyone else like me?

[Mr.Freeze]

you sick fvck!:)

[grifter]

Twitch - I think those white bits that you were crunching into are hardend pieces of toilet paper that have become trapped in the folds of the skin and have been left to ferment. They must have quite a spicy taste to them like some of those seasoned croutons? Maybe you should pick them out and add them to your salad...like little sunflower seeds

[Demonwolf]

dogs smell their asses...

[deleteduser0002]

God I missed twitch! :D

[physique]

twitch has some the sickest posts on earth an some real classic ones too.

he is on the boards just for show and to make people think he is serious when hes so full of shit!

[MuSuLPhReAk]

when hes so full of shit!


LITERALLY!!! LMAO!!

[blimp]

****er posted in the blogs and no one saw it. Sick!!!

[Mr Ontario]

Ya! I don't think it's funny in the least! I would have to say inmature.... There must be other boards out there that talk trash like this....This is a bodybuilding board ...Think about it...if he writes crap like this...what do you think he does in real life? Just plain retarded is all this guy is.

[Houstonbc]

my thoughts exactly

[Juicy_brucy]

can this be deleted please?

[Big D]

I think his girlfriend stinks down there because she whipes back to front