L3
19-05-2009, 09:00 PM
i just have to last 13 more days, june 1st, thats when the magic happens. ive been practicing IM with b12 for the past two months, im dying to get to use my goodies... i have been so good, not deviating from my start date, even though i can hear the little vials calling me from the province over.
ive done a lot of growing naturally since my first cycle, bulked like a mother****er all winter, then went keto in february until i injured my shoulder, and since then its been strict high protein, med carb, moderate fat. **** my diet. i want it to be winter again. i hate eating 2 cups of broccoli every day. my shit has been hilighter green for past 2 months. i still ****ign do it day in day out. i dont even enjoy the weekend anymore. my life revolves around eating every 2.5-3hrs. which means sleeping in on the weekend cuts into my eating routine. when i dont eat on time, i get cranky. realllllly irritable and mean.
ever looked in the mirror and said to yourself...why do i keep doing this... im satisfied with my body composition....why do i torture myself on this ridiculous(by average peoples standards) diet, day in and day out, for the past 4 months.... **** its so hard to keep motivated.
and then we have the girl issue. wintertime was about me.. no one picks up when they are bulking... if they do, they either have a shitload of game, or aren't bulking properly.......either way, i was so focused up until springtime hit. focused on the gym. focused on training balls to the wall 6 days a week. even if girls had approached me, i wouldnt notice, i had no interest in sex...just lifting weights. now, the first girl i have and active interst in dating in at least a year, likes my personality, but unfortunate for me isnt into muscular guys, or guys who shave their chests, or guy with crazy ass diets who eats 2 chickenbreasts, 2 cups broccoli, 1 cup lettuce, 2 cups oatmeal and 1tbsn PB every lunch.... yes i know many more girls around, summertime is here, shouldnt get hung up on one, but i have obsessive-compulsive issues which are ideal for bodybuilding, but not ideal from keeping my sanity.... so ive gone from 0 interest, to 150% crush stupid ass teenage fantasies in my head, to -78% rejection youre a good guy but not what im looking for, so ill invite you to my brithday but then beg a mutual friend to come keep you company there because well i dont know why i invited you in the first place.
****ing pa thet ic
there are positives in my life though, im moving to a new place with lots of young ppl for neighbours, i got a new well paid intellectually stimulating job, and well... its almost time for me to run my gear
thanks for listening CBB, its gonna be a painful 13 days......
ps. i will be putting up before and after cycle pics
:popc2
ive done a lot of growing naturally since my first cycle, bulked like a mother****er all winter, then went keto in february until i injured my shoulder, and since then its been strict high protein, med carb, moderate fat. **** my diet. i want it to be winter again. i hate eating 2 cups of broccoli every day. my shit has been hilighter green for past 2 months. i still ****ign do it day in day out. i dont even enjoy the weekend anymore. my life revolves around eating every 2.5-3hrs. which means sleeping in on the weekend cuts into my eating routine. when i dont eat on time, i get cranky. realllllly irritable and mean.
ever looked in the mirror and said to yourself...why do i keep doing this... im satisfied with my body composition....why do i torture myself on this ridiculous(by average peoples standards) diet, day in and day out, for the past 4 months.... **** its so hard to keep motivated.
and then we have the girl issue. wintertime was about me.. no one picks up when they are bulking... if they do, they either have a shitload of game, or aren't bulking properly.......either way, i was so focused up until springtime hit. focused on the gym. focused on training balls to the wall 6 days a week. even if girls had approached me, i wouldnt notice, i had no interest in sex...just lifting weights. now, the first girl i have and active interst in dating in at least a year, likes my personality, but unfortunate for me isnt into muscular guys, or guys who shave their chests, or guy with crazy ass diets who eats 2 chickenbreasts, 2 cups broccoli, 1 cup lettuce, 2 cups oatmeal and 1tbsn PB every lunch.... yes i know many more girls around, summertime is here, shouldnt get hung up on one, but i have obsessive-compulsive issues which are ideal for bodybuilding, but not ideal from keeping my sanity.... so ive gone from 0 interest, to 150% crush stupid ass teenage fantasies in my head, to -78% rejection youre a good guy but not what im looking for, so ill invite you to my brithday but then beg a mutual friend to come keep you company there because well i dont know why i invited you in the first place.
****ing pa thet ic
there are positives in my life though, im moving to a new place with lots of young ppl for neighbours, i got a new well paid intellectually stimulating job, and well... its almost time for me to run my gear
thanks for listening CBB, its gonna be a painful 13 days......
ps. i will be putting up before and after cycle pics
:popc2