Cleanse diets are gay

[daande]

In the past 2 weeks I have heard a bunch of people inform me they are on some sort of cleanse diet. I think they are all stupid. What do you guys/girls think?

[JacktheThriller]

your not going to lose any permanent weight on a cleanse people trick themselves into flushing the body, but really your body just empties itself and sends huge hunger signals to the brain

people lose 12pds well if you think about how much food you eat in a day several pounds and then how long it takes to process that food 24hr + then obviously if your stop filling up your belly you are going to weigh less. And if you deprive carbs you will lose another 10 pds in water so yes

THEY ARE GAY

[natenator]

I don't think they are gay. I think if used in the context of trying to flush out toxins they can be very beneficial.

[ubcpower]

I think they are done for the wrong reasons.

Most people do a cleanse diet for "weight loss" this is completely absurd and as JacktheTHriller says the weight loss is mainly water weight and the fact that you have no solid food in your system.

However, if you (ESPECIALLY MALES in their 30+'s ) are not taking a fibre supplement atleast twice a day and you are eating a bodybuilding type diet, i think a cleanse or some type of colon cleanse is a good thing. Diverticulitus...etc is one of the key initial sparks or causes of colon cancer and when we are eating the volume of food we do , especially those of us with nuts in our diets, a cleanse could be a very beneficial thing.
I have heard horror stories from bodybuilding buddies of mine of what actually comes out when they did cleanses...its pretty startling

[musclehead123]

I don't think they are gay. I think if used in the context of trying to flush out toxins they can be very beneficial.


I agree, I don't think they are gay either. Not only will you flush out toxins, but I believe they would increase absorbtion in the small intestine by taking the crap out of the villi.

[ironwill]

I think they are done for the wrong reasons.

Most people do a cleanse diet for "weight loss" this is completely absurd and as JacktheTHriller says the weight loss is mainly water weight and the fact that you have no solid food in your system.

However, if you (ESPECIALLY MALES in their 30+'s ) are not taking a fibre supplement atleast twice a day and you are eating a bodybuilding type diet, i think a cleanse or some type of colon cleanse is a good thing. Diverticulitus...etc is one of the key initial sparks or causes of colon cancer and when we are eating the volume of food we do , especially those of us with nuts in our diets, a cleanse could be a very beneficial thing.
I have heard horror stories from bodybuilding buddies of mine of what actually comes out when they did cleanses...its pretty startling

Agreed i do a couple per yr, always when starting pct, i do a cleanse.......It feels great, and is not pretty....lol...
But i believe it to be very beneficial....

[Big D]

when I worked at GNC as a student, I would have 300 pound women buying a 30 day cleanse, thinking its some sort of magic drug that help you lose a tone of weight, then they would return it in 20 days, saying they didnt lose a single pound, at same time they have A&W in their shopping cart.

so ya they would use it for the wrong reasons.

[daande]

I hear people who party hard saying they are going on some 2 week cleanse diet to get all the toxins out from drinking 4 times a week out of there system. I don't think 2 weeks or not drinking and eating some nuts and berries is going to really help them out.

[PdH]

I don't think they are gay. I think if used in the context of trying to flush out toxins they can be very beneficial.

All of daande's toxins reside in his brain so I don't think they would be of much benefit for his malady.

[daande]

All of daande's toxins reside in his brain so I don't think they would be of much benefit for his malady.

Go huff some gas, Native.

EDIT: Stolen gas.

[PdH]

Go huff some gas, Native.

EDIT: Stolen gas.

Heh, heh. That's all you've got. Thanks for proving my point, yet again.

[natenator]

Go huff some gas, Native.

EDIT: Stolen gas.
So I'm curious when Daane is going to be banned? His hostility towards PhD specifically citing (at any opportunity he can) racial slurs it not welcomed. He's gone above and beyond the traditional "flame war" insults that are often part of discussion forums and is now boarding on racial hatred.

Daane offers this community nothing but jokes from his 'relationship' fables and misguided HRT advice which he pawns off as an experienced practitioner yet with limited actual knowledge.

[SuperQT]

It really depends what is considered in the cleanse the diet of lemon juice cayenne pepper etc to lose a few pounds is fairly retarded. However if it is something like a few weeks of fresh fish and organic veggies that sort of thing is reasonable but the stuff where drink some crap mix for a week don’t eat not so good for you IMO. Our bodies are pretty amazing if you are eating well to begin with getting enough fiber etc you are cleansing yourself already. If you living off Big Macs and crap well that is a different story.

[tiramisu]

In the past 2 weeks I have heard a bunch of people inform me they are on some sort of cleanse diet. I think they are all stupid. What do you guys/girls think?

Yup definitely gay.
Flushing toxins is a complete myth and a couple of doses of fibre in the diet will do you far better in terms of keeping things moving and clean without the self abuse.

The whole pdh indian thing is mostly just weak. Daande is doing himself far more damage than he is doing pdh. Nonetheless, I don't think personally directed racial slurs should be tolerated either. I don't mind a good old fashioned ad hominen attack now and then but this doesn't seem to be in jest or fun.

[Gilmour]

Go huff some gas, Native.

EDIT: Stolen gas.

That wasn't funny or original UNTIL you specified the gas being stolen.

[Gilmour]

So I'm curious when Daane is going to be banned? His hostility towards PhD specifically citing (at any opportunity he can) racial slurs it not welcomed. He's gone above and beyond the traditional "flame war" insults that are often part of discussion forums and is now boarding on racial hatred.

Daane offers this community nothing but jokes from his 'relationship' fables and misguided HRT advice which he pawns off as an experienced practitioner yet with limited actual knowledge.


Pdh has a good sense of humour. He's a big educated boy and can dish it too. Let him decide what is over the line. I love racial humour, it's the best kind IMO. I work with Natives and they always have the best Native jokes. One of the worst things about Canada, and the reason why we no longer can say Merry Christmas without admonishment or guilt, is that white people decide for everyone else what might offend that particular group. Let Pdh decide.

[natenator]

Pdh has a good sense of humour. He's a big educated boy and can dish it too. Let him decide what is over the line. I love racial humour, it's the best kind IMO. I work with Natives and they always have the best Native jokes. One of the worst things about Canada, and the reason why we no longer can say Merry Christmas without admonishment or guilt, is that white people decide for everyone else what might offend that particular group. Let Pdh decide.
I have no issue with racial jokes but Daande isn't doing it from a humour perspective. If it was done from that aspect I'd have no care in the world.

[Gilmour]

I have no issue with racial jokes but Daande isn't doing it from a humour perspective. If it was done from that aspect I'd have no care in the world.


As long as he's laughing it's humorous to someone;). I don't know the kid but maybe he should add a few smilies after his barbs. I agree with you though.

[PdH]

From my perspective it all depends on how the person who is the target of slurs is affected. Certainly daande is attempting to be malicious, but his opinions and slurs have no effect on me whatsoever. He doesn't have the capacity to think beyond the lowest common denominator, so he uses what he can, and makes himself look foolish in the process. Essentially this started some time back with my pointing out flaws in his logic, and his regression to the utilization of schoolyard tactics when he was unable to support his position intellectually.

He's kind of like the court jester or the retard geek you allowed to hang around on occasion for the amusement. I don't think he should be banned, it's much to lenient, and far less amusing.

[SARGE]

Pdh has a good sense of humour. He's a big educated boy and can dish it too. Let him decide what is over the line. I love racial humour, it's the best kind IMO. I work with Natives and they always have the best Native jokes. One of the worst things about Canada, and the reason why we no longer can say Merry Christmas without admonishment or guilt, is that white people decide for everyone else what might offend that particular group. Let Pdh decide.

I agree,one of my best friends is native,been buds for over 30 years.He can tell the best jokes.We are always hacking on each other about are heritage.
He can't hit the broad side of a barn with my compound bow.Whats up with that?haha

[Ritch]

Well if we`re going to ban members based on racial slurs, Dandee won`t be the only one to be banned.

[natenator]

Well if we`re going to ban members based on racial slurs, Dandee won`t be the only one to be banned.
Wasn't so much that is was a racial slur but rather he, any time he can, will purposely make racially negative remarks directed to a specific member who is of said race/culture.

But I hear what you're saying and I'm fine with Wade and BAM being banned too. lol

[natenator]

Well if we`re going to ban members based on racial slurs, Dandee won`t be the only one to be banned.
Wasn't so much that is was a racial slur but rather he, any time he can, will purposely make racially negative remarks directed to a specific member who is of said race/culture.

But I hear what you're saying and I'm fine with Wade and BAM being banned too. lol

[Ritch]

But I hear what you're saying and I'm fine with Wade and BAM being banned too. lol

Snarf, snarf... :puff

[natenator]

Snarf, snarf... :puff
:D

[Gilmour]

Well if we`re going to ban members based on racial slurs, Dandee won`t be the only one to be banned.


Sign me up for the banned list. I used the term ' nine iron ' just today and Bam hates the Jews. Must be a Kingston thing.

[Gilmour]

I agree,one of my best friends is native,been buds for over 30 years.He can tell the best jokes.We are always hacking on each other about are heritage.
He can't hit the broad side of a barn with my compound bow.Whats up with that?haha


He coud probably hit it if he was sober.:yeah

[Gilmour]

From my perspective it all depends on how the person who is the target of slurs is affected. Certainly daande is attempting to be malicious, but his opinions and slurs have no effect on me whatsoever. He doesn't have the capacity to think beyond the lowest common denominator, so he uses what he can, and makes himself look foolish in the process. Essentially this started some time back with my pointing out flaws in his logic, and his regression to the utilization of schoolyard tactics when he was unable to support his position intellectually.

He's kind of like the court jester or the retard geek you allowed to hang around on occasion for the amusement. I don't think he should be banned, it's much to lenient, and far less amusing.


Sometimes the lowest form of humour gets the most laughs. Base humour can be viewed as cutting edge. I still laugh at Beavis and Butthead and Peter Sellers falling down stairs.

[SARGE]

He coud probably hit it if he was sober.:yeah

Yeah but they were light beers

[cog]

I wouldn't want any member banned but directing hate at any one member really isn't needed.Thick skin is a requirement at times but PDH must have the hide of a rhino.

[waderow]

Wasn't so much that is was a racial slur but rather he, any time he can, will purposely make racially negative remarks directed to a specific member who is of said race/culture.

But I hear what you're saying and I'm fine with Wade and BAM being banned too. lol

go **** your self you fat wop

lol

[natenator]

wtf? im not italian :(

[waderow]

i had to say something

[Gilmour]

I wouldn't want any member banned but directing hate at any one member really isn't needed.Thick skin is a requirement at times but PDH must have the hide of a rhino.


That Ovie loving faggot #8 deserves plenty of hate. Only him. Maybe Cheesesteak too.

[natenator]

i had to say something
I said it hoping you would say something lol

[daande]

From my perspective it all depends on how the person who is the target of slurs is affected. Certainly daande is attempting to be malicious, but his opinions and slurs have no effect on me whatsoever. He doesn't have the capacity to think beyond the lowest common denominator, so he uses what he can, and makes himself look foolish in the process. Essentially this started some time back with my pointing out flaws in his logic, and his regression to the utilization of schoolyard tactics when he was unable to support his position intellectually.

He's kind of like the court jester or the retard geek you allowed to hang around on occasion for the amusement. I don't think he should be banned, it's much to lenient, and far less amusing.

The words you chose to use in an internet bodybuilding forum is hilarious. You choose these words because you think it makes you seem better than everyone else here or because you have a small penis. No one else on these forums write forum posts as it is an academic paper other than you.

[daande]

wtf? im not italian :(

No but you are a pussy.:)

[dku]

Everything I've heard about them from people educated in medicine is that the idea of "flushing toxins" is nonsense. The idea of toxins is pseudoscience, and eating maple syrup and cayenne pepper is certainly not going to make any difference in the body's natural systems. Lastly, I think people use to the idea of a cleanse to justify doing unhealthy things the rest of the time (drinking, smoking, eating garbage).

[PdH]

The words you chose to use in an internet bodybuilding forum is hilarious. You choose these words because you think it makes you seem better than everyone else here or because you have a small penis. No one else on these forums write forum posts as it is an academic paper other than you.

What's that daande? I can't understand the gibberish you're writing. Are you drunk? You must be really drunk.

[daande]

What's that daande? I can't understand the gibberish you're writing. Are you drunk? You must be really drunk.

:ilu

[PdH]

:ilu

I'll start writing like you daande if it makes you feel better.

Affer am dun ma homewurk imma gunna go down the fishcin whole an cach me sum catfish with sum big ole wiskers en fried em up four diner. Theys gunna be reel gud and theys gunna puts loots of mussels on me. I's cant weight to git their.

[daande]

I'll start writing like you daande if it makes you feel better.

Affer am dun ma homewurk imma gunna go down the fishcin whole an cach me sum catfish with sum big ole wiskers en fried em up four diner. Theys gunna be reel gud and theys gunna puts loots of mussels on me. I's cant weight to git their.

You are a re-tard(said like the guy from the hangover.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yMpsttlXye8&NR=1

[waderow]

catfish makes you big cause all the gear that gets dumped down the drains and gets in to their meet casue they are bottom feeders man

[natenator]

catfish makes you big cause all the gear that gets dumped down the drains and gets in to their meet casue they are bottom feeders man
lmao

[vakker]

catfish makes you big cause all the gear that gets dumped down the drains and gets in to their meet casue they are bottom feeders man

+1 quoted for validity.

[ubcpower]

Good read on a cleanse that Dave Palumbo/Romano just did.

http://www.rxmuscle.com/articles/romanos-rage/1177-who-does-number-2-work-for-the-bosses-clean-their-colon.html

[ubcpower]

Here is the actual diet info

Stanley Burroughs’ Master Cleanse Diet

The Master Cleanse is a 10-day fast that is used for detox and weight loss purposes. It has also been called the Master Cleanser Diet after the original book that described it, the Lemonade Diet, the Maple Syrup Diet, and the Cayenne Pepper Diet after some of the ingredients used, and the Beyoncé Diet after its most famous fan.

Although the Master Cleanse is often referred to as a fast, it’s not really a complete fast, in that up to 1,300 calories are consumed each day in the form of sugars from the ingredients in the beverage that Master Cleansers prepare and drink.

Background

Stanley Burroughs

The Master Cleanse was originally developed in 1940 as a stomach ulcer cure by alternative health practitioner Stanley Burroughs (1903-1991). In 1976 Burroughs presented his diet in a book, The Master Cleanser, by which time he was promoting the diet not only for ulcers, but for weight loss and “every kind of disease,” claiming it would lead to “the correction of all disorders.” The book is a disorganized, difficult-to-decipher jumble, and in 2004 a fan of the diet, Peter Glickman, published his more comprehensible version in the book Lose Weight, Have More Energy & Be Happier in 10 Days, dubbing it the “Lemonade Diet.” Glickman’s book revived the diet’s popularity.

Neither Burroughs nor Glickman was a physician or medical researcher. Burroughs promoted a number of alternative practices beyond the Master Cleanse, including light therapy, deep massage, and reflexology, and he was a practicing nudist and vegetarian. He was convicted of practicing medicine without a license and imprisoned, and he was convicted of second degree murder, later overturned, for his role in the death of a desperate leukemia patient, whose cancer Burroughs tried to cure with the Master Cleanse and other practices. Glickman is a software engineer cum chiropractor who has promoted the medically rejected practice of chelation.

Among the celebrities who have been reported to have used the diet are Beyonce Knowles, who lost 20 pounds in two weeks for her role in the movie Dreamgirls, and Howard Stern sidekick Robin Quivers, who was quoted in People magazine that she heard about it from magician David Blaine and used it on three occasions while reducing her weight to 145 pounds from 218 pounds. Actor Jared Leto used the Master Cleanse to lose the 60 or so pounds that he had gained for his role as John Lennon’s killer Mark David Chapman. Singers Ashanti and Trina have also been connected with the diet. Moses and Jesus both reportedly underwent a pre-Burroughs 40-day version of the diet, not involving lemonade or laxatives.
Does it Work?

Does the diet work for weight loss? If you follow the instructions, it most certainly will work. Any fast will cause you to lose weight, because you aren’t eating food. The Master Cleanse in the strict sense is not a fast because you drink a considerable amount of sugar-containing lemonade, about 650 to 1,300 calories worth per day, depending on the number of glasses you drink. Thus you will have a daily calorie deficit: Most non-overweight people need from 1,600 to 2,400 calories per day to maintain their weight (women will be on the lower end of that range). If you are overweight, you are probably consuming more than that to maintain your weight.

As an example, if you normally eat 2,150 calories, and you choose the extreme 650-calorie version of the Master Cleanse, you will have a 1,500-calorie deficit, losing three pounds of fat per week (and perhaps some water weight also). (There may be other factors that will affect this result.) Many reputable diets prescribe a two-pound per week loss, so in this sense the Master Cleanse is actually not that radical: it just substitutes lemonade for real food and adds the shock effect of constant colon cleansing.
Is is Dangerous?

Most medical authorities don’t believe that a few days of fasting will harm you (and the Master Cleanse is more of a low-calorie, nutrient deficient diet than a fast). But longer periods will begin to deplete muscle, and your heart is among the muscles that will suffer — not a good thing. In addition, longer fasts can damage your kidneys and liver. Where is the safe cut-off point? We can’t really say.

Less is known about the long-term effects of 10 days or more of salt-water laxative use.
About This Detox Stuff

Most people today, deep down, are interested in the Master Cleanse primarily for its get-skinny-quick aspect, although they rarely admit it. But there is also a detox component. What about detox?

There’s no evidence that our bodies contain excessive toxins of the sort Burroughs discusses, and there’s no evidence that detox diets flush out anything bad in your body. Many of our organs, including the liver, kidneys, lungs, and the intestines, are very efficient filters that expel toxins. There are toxins that may be trapped in fat cells or the lungs, but this sort of diet does not help with expelling those.

We’ve included some quotes from Stanley Burroughs at the end of this article so you can read for yourself how naive and outdated his medical theories were.
How to Do the Master Cleanse

In a nutshell, the Master Cleanse is this:

* The diet takes at least 10 days (up to 40 days, the period of time that Jesus fasted after his baptism, as Burroughs points out)
* The only nourishment that you take is a special lemonade concoction made from lemon juice, maple syrup, cayenne pepper, and water, six to twelve glasses per day, each glass containing about 110 calories in sugar carbohydrates
* An herbal laxative tea is drunk at night and a quart of salt water is drunk first thing in the morning, resulting in several liquid bowel movements every day — you need to always be near a toilet when you do this diet, and you need to stock up on toilet paper
* You come off the diet by transitioning to solid food over a few days, ideally becoming a raw food vegetarian in Stanley Burroughs’ version of the diet

Master Cleanse kits are available from Peter Glickman, Coombs, Neera, and Maple Valley Syrup. All ingredients for the recipes are included, except for fresh lemons, which must be sourced locally, although some Master Cleansers bend the rules and use Lakewood 100% Organic bottled pure lemon juice.
The Master Cleanse Lemonade

The lemonade is prepared by mixing the ingredients in this free recipe:

* 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice. Burroughs recommends organic lemons, fresh, not bottled juice. Limes may be substituted. Lemon zest and pulp may be added, making sure that the lemons are organic and not artificially colored or treated with pesticides.
* 2 tablespoons of maple syrup. This must be pure maple syrup, not pancake syrup. Burroughs recommends the darker Grade B, which has more color and nutrients than Grade A, which is also acceptable. He goes into aspects of maple syrup production that would be difficult for the average person to investigate, such as whether formaldehyde or plastic tubing is used (not recommended by Burroughs).
* 1/10 teaspoon cayenne pepper. Burroughs insists that cayenne chili pepper be used, but permits ramping up from a lesser amount if the taste needs getting used to.
* Water. Burroughs recommends a 10-ounce glass of medium hot water, but also allows cold water to be used. Some have interpreted “10-ounce glass” to mean 8 ounces of actual water. Since Burroughs also allows plain water to be drunk during the fast in addition to the lemonade, this doesn’t seem important.

An alternative to the lemonade endorsed by Burroughs substitutes 10 ounces of fresh sugarcane juice for the lemon juice and water. But few people are going to have access to fresh, organic sugar cane juice. Some people who can not stomach the maple syrup taste have substituted an equal number of calories of powdered sugarcane or organic cane sugar, available from some health food stores (one user described it as tasting like pond scum, worse than the maple syrup).
Things to Avoid at All Costs

Burroughs strongly counsels against the use of honey in the lemonade or the consumption at any time of honey, which he describes as predigested bee vomit, popular only among “gullible health foodists.”

Burroughs also cautions against taking any kind of supplements or vitamin pills or using illicit drugs. Although Glickman wisely recommends against going off any prescription medications without your doctor’s approval, it’s unclear what Burroughs’ opinion was on this point. He reprints without comment an endorsement from a follower who relates how he quit his medications for blood pressure, nerves, and lack of energy during his fast. And Burroughs was generally against traditional medicine in general, discouraging a leukemia patient from getting a bone marrow transplant. And an alternative version of the Master Cleanse for diabetics described in the book recommends that the diabetic phase out insulin during the diet. In another context in the book Burroughs rails against “the unnatural action of drugs and antibiotics,” saying they store “poisons in the body.” But we’re with Glickman on this one.

You shouldn’t smoke or drink alcohol, coffee, tea, cola, but the good news is that your cravings for them will completely disappear, according to Burroughs. Burroughs allows the consumption of extra plain water and of mint tea.

No other food or drink should be consumed at all, say both Burroughs and Glickman.
The Colon Blaster

There are two preparations needed to induce colon cleansing.

* Laxative herb tea. Although Burroughs is quite specific about types and amounts of lemons and maple syrup, on the subject of laxative herb teas he simply suggests without further elaboration that you should buy any good brand offered by your health food store.
* Internal salt water bathing solution. Dissolve two teaspoons of uniodized sea salt in a quart of lukewarm water.

The laxative herb tea and the salt water are the one-two punch that will keep your colon in full-time Old Faithful mode during the diet, cleansing it clean as a whistle.
During the Diet

To begin the diet you need to choose the minimum number of days that you are going to attempt, steel yourself for what is to come, and follow the following daily routine.

Day 0 (the day before beginning the diet):

Master Cleanse Supplies

Purchase lemons, maple syrup, cayenne pepper, laxative herbal tea, and sea salt in sufficient quantities to last the duration of your cleanse.

Purchase a large supply of toilet paper and Tucks® brand witch hazel wipes. If you share your bathroom with others, agree on a unque emergency code phrase like “It’s coming,” “Dr. Livingston, I presume,” or “Elvis is leaving the building” to alert other members of your household that you need them to vacate the bathroom quickly; also, consider purchasing a supply of adult diapers.

The night before beginning the diet, drink some laxative herbal tea, and retire for the evening.

Days 1 through 10 (and Beyond):

* In the morning before drinking any lemonade, drink a quart of salt water (remain near a toilet).
* During the day drink 6 to 12 glasses of the Master Cleanse lemonade concoction. The lower number of 6 glasses is recommended for those seeking weight loss. The higher number is fine for those interested mostly in detoxification.
* In the evening drink some herbal laxative tea.
* You may experience dizziness, vomiting, joint pain, and weakness. You will also be really hungry. After several days many Master Cleanse dieters report entering a state of bliss that is either the result of the continuing elimination of toxins, or else a state similar to the tranquil experience that people who are starving to death have shortly before dying.

Note: Over the years since Stanley Burroughs’ death variations of the original Master Cleanse described here have developed, and attempts at clarifying ambiguous points have been made. Peter Glickman’s book, as well as this popular internet based book, deal with some of these modifications to the Master Cleanse orthodoxy.
Post Diet: Breaking the Fast

When are you through with the diet? Either when you reach the number of days that you planned, or alternately, when your tongue goes from “coated and fuzzy” to a clear pink color.

Burroughs outlines a gentle approach for coming off the diet without upsetting your digestive system excessively. Although Burroughs recommends that you become a practicing raw foodist vegetarian after the diet to avoid recontamination with toxic dead animal flesh, he does provide an alternative transition plan for omnivores.

[Ritch]

Dave Palumbo only did the diet for 3 days. Thought it seemed short. I`ve seen one guy do it before and he looked like hell as he was doing it.

[O-Train]

Strikingly similar to the other thread about Kevin Trudeau. Further proof that indeed half of all people have an IQ of or below 100.


Here is the actual diet info

Stanley Burroughs’ Master Cleanse Diet

The Master Cleanse is a 10-day fast that is used for detox and weight loss purposes. It has also been called the Master Cleanser Diet after the original book that described it, the Lemonade Diet, the Maple Syrup Diet, and the Cayenne Pepper Diet after some of the ingredients used, and the Beyoncé Diet after its most famous fan.

Although the Master Cleanse is often referred to as a fast, it’s not really a complete fast, in that up to 1,300 calories are consumed each day in the form of sugars from the ingredients in the beverage that Master Cleansers prepare and drink.

Background

Stanley Burroughs

The Master Cleanse was originally developed in 1940 as a stomach ulcer cure by alternative health practitioner Stanley Burroughs (1903-1991). In 1976 Burroughs presented his diet in a book, The Master Cleanser, by which time he was promoting the diet not only for ulcers, but for weight loss and “every kind of disease,” claiming it would lead to “the correction of all disorders.” The book is a disorganized, difficult-to-decipher jumble, and in 2004 a fan of the diet, Peter Glickman, published his more comprehensible version in the book Lose Weight, Have More Energy & Be Happier in 10 Days, dubbing it the “Lemonade Diet.” Glickman’s book revived the diet’s popularity.

Neither Burroughs nor Glickman was a physician or medical researcher. Burroughs promoted a number of alternative practices beyond the Master Cleanse, including light therapy, deep massage, and reflexology, and he was a practicing nudist and vegetarian. He was convicted of practicing medicine without a license and imprisoned, and he was convicted of second degree murder, later overturned, for his role in the death of a desperate leukemia patient, whose cancer Burroughs tried to cure with the Master Cleanse and other practices. Glickman is a software engineer cum chiropractor who has promoted the medically rejected practice of chelation.

Among the celebrities who have been reported to have used the diet are Beyonce Knowles, who lost 20 pounds in two weeks for her role in the movie Dreamgirls, and Howard Stern sidekick Robin Quivers, who was quoted in People magazine that she heard about it from magician David Blaine and used it on three occasions while reducing her weight to 145 pounds from 218 pounds. Actor Jared Leto used the Master Cleanse to lose the 60 or so pounds that he had gained for his role as John Lennon’s killer Mark David Chapman. Singers Ashanti and Trina have also been connected with the diet. Moses and Jesus both reportedly underwent a pre-Burroughs 40-day version of the diet, not involving lemonade or laxatives.
Does it Work?

Does the diet work for weight loss? If you follow the instructions, it most certainly will work. Any fast will cause you to lose weight, because you aren’t eating food. The Master Cleanse in the strict sense is not a fast because you drink a considerable amount of sugar-containing lemonade, about 650 to 1,300 calories worth per day, depending on the number of glasses you drink. Thus you will have a daily calorie deficit: Most non-overweight people need from 1,600 to 2,400 calories per day to maintain their weight (women will be on the lower end of that range). If you are overweight, you are probably consuming more than that to maintain your weight.

As an example, if you normally eat 2,150 calories, and you choose the extreme 650-calorie version of the Master Cleanse, you will have a 1,500-calorie deficit, losing three pounds of fat per week (and perhaps some water weight also). (There may be other factors that will affect this result.) Many reputable diets prescribe a two-pound per week loss, so in this sense the Master Cleanse is actually not that radical: it just substitutes lemonade for real food and adds the shock effect of constant colon cleansing.
Is is Dangerous?

Most medical authorities don’t believe that a few days of fasting will harm you (and the Master Cleanse is more of a low-calorie, nutrient deficient diet than a fast). But longer periods will begin to deplete muscle, and your heart is among the muscles that will suffer — not a good thing. In addition, longer fasts can damage your kidneys and liver. Where is the safe cut-off point? We can’t really say.

Less is known about the long-term effects of 10 days or more of salt-water laxative use.
About This Detox Stuff

Most people today, deep down, are interested in the Master Cleanse primarily for its get-skinny-quick aspect, although they rarely admit it. But there is also a detox component. What about detox?

There’s no evidence that our bodies contain excessive toxins of the sort Burroughs discusses, and there’s no evidence that detox diets flush out anything bad in your body. Many of our organs, including the liver, kidneys, lungs, and the intestines, are very efficient filters that expel toxins. There are toxins that may be trapped in fat cells or the lungs, but this sort of diet does not help with expelling those.

We’ve included some quotes from Stanley Burroughs at the end of this article so you can read for yourself how naive and outdated his medical theories were.
How to Do the Master Cleanse

In a nutshell, the Master Cleanse is this:

* The diet takes at least 10 days (up to 40 days, the period of time that Jesus fasted after his baptism, as Burroughs points out)
* The only nourishment that you take is a special lemonade concoction made from lemon juice, maple syrup, cayenne pepper, and water, six to twelve glasses per day, each glass containing about 110 calories in sugar carbohydrates
* An herbal laxative tea is drunk at night and a quart of salt water is drunk first thing in the morning, resulting in several liquid bowel movements every day — you need to always be near a toilet when you do this diet, and you need to stock up on toilet paper
* You come off the diet by transitioning to solid food over a few days, ideally becoming a raw food vegetarian in Stanley Burroughs’ version of the diet

Master Cleanse kits are available from Peter Glickman, Coombs, Neera, and Maple Valley Syrup. All ingredients for the recipes are included, except for fresh lemons, which must be sourced locally, although some Master Cleansers bend the rules and use Lakewood 100% Organic bottled pure lemon juice.
The Master Cleanse Lemonade

The lemonade is prepared by mixing the ingredients in this free recipe:

* 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice. Burroughs recommends organic lemons, fresh, not bottled juice. Limes may be substituted. Lemon zest and pulp may be added, making sure that the lemons are organic and not artificially colored or treated with pesticides.
* 2 tablespoons of maple syrup. This must be pure maple syrup, not pancake syrup. Burroughs recommends the darker Grade B, which has more color and nutrients than Grade A, which is also acceptable. He goes into aspects of maple syrup production that would be difficult for the average person to investigate, such as whether formaldehyde or plastic tubing is used (not recommended by Burroughs).
* 1/10 teaspoon cayenne pepper. Burroughs insists that cayenne chili pepper be used, but permits ramping up from a lesser amount if the taste needs getting used to.
* Water. Burroughs recommends a 10-ounce glass of medium hot water, but also allows cold water to be used. Some have interpreted “10-ounce glass” to mean 8 ounces of actual water. Since Burroughs also allows plain water to be drunk during the fast in addition to the lemonade, this doesn’t seem important.

An alternative to the lemonade endorsed by Burroughs substitutes 10 ounces of fresh sugarcane juice for the lemon juice and water. But few people are going to have access to fresh, organic sugar cane juice. Some people who can not stomach the maple syrup taste have substituted an equal number of calories of powdered sugarcane or organic cane sugar, available from some health food stores (one user described it as tasting like pond scum, worse than the maple syrup).
Things to Avoid at All Costs

Burroughs strongly counsels against the use of honey in the lemonade or the consumption at any time of honey, which he describes as predigested bee vomit, popular only among “gullible health foodists.”

Burroughs also cautions against taking any kind of supplements or vitamin pills or using illicit drugs. Although Glickman wisely recommends against going off any prescription medications without your doctor’s approval, it’s unclear what Burroughs’ opinion was on this point. He reprints without comment an endorsement from a follower who relates how he quit his medications for blood pressure, nerves, and lack of energy during his fast. And Burroughs was generally against traditional medicine in general, discouraging a leukemia patient from getting a bone marrow transplant. And an alternative version of the Master Cleanse for diabetics described in the book recommends that the diabetic phase out insulin during the diet. In another context in the book Burroughs rails against “the unnatural action of drugs and antibiotics,” saying they store “poisons in the body.” But we’re with Glickman on this one.

You shouldn’t smoke or drink alcohol, coffee, tea, cola, but the good news is that your cravings for them will completely disappear, according to Burroughs. Burroughs allows the consumption of extra plain water and of mint tea.

No other food or drink should be consumed at all, say both Burroughs and Glickman.
The Colon Blaster

There are two preparations needed to induce colon cleansing.

* Laxative herb tea. Although Burroughs is quite specific about types and amounts of lemons and maple syrup, on the subject of laxative herb teas he simply suggests without further elaboration that you should buy any good brand offered by your health food store.
* Internal salt water bathing solution. Dissolve two teaspoons of uniodized sea salt in a quart of lukewarm water.

The laxative herb tea and the salt water are the one-two punch that will keep your colon in full-time Old Faithful mode during the diet, cleansing it clean as a whistle.
During the Diet

To begin the diet you need to choose the minimum number of days that you are going to attempt, steel yourself for what is to come, and follow the following daily routine.

Day 0 (the day before beginning the diet):

Master Cleanse Supplies

Purchase lemons, maple syrup, cayenne pepper, laxative herbal tea, and sea salt in sufficient quantities to last the duration of your cleanse.

Purchase a large supply of toilet paper and Tucks® brand witch hazel wipes. If you share your bathroom with others, agree on a unque emergency code phrase like “It’s coming,” “Dr. Livingston, I presume,” or “Elvis is leaving the building” to alert other members of your household that you need them to vacate the bathroom quickly; also, consider purchasing a supply of adult diapers.

The night before beginning the diet, drink some laxative herbal tea, and retire for the evening.

Days 1 through 10 (and Beyond):

* In the morning before drinking any lemonade, drink a quart of salt water (remain near a toilet).
* During the day drink 6 to 12 glasses of the Master Cleanse lemonade concoction. The lower number of 6 glasses is recommended for those seeking weight loss. The higher number is fine for those interested mostly in detoxification.
* In the evening drink some herbal laxative tea.
* You may experience dizziness, vomiting, joint pain, and weakness. You will also be really hungry. After several days many Master Cleanse dieters report entering a state of bliss that is either the result of the continuing elimination of toxins, or else a state similar to the tranquil experience that people who are starving to death have shortly before dying.

Note: Over the years since Stanley Burroughs’ death variations of the original Master Cleanse described here have developed, and attempts at clarifying ambiguous points have been made. Peter Glickman’s book, as well as this popular internet based book, deal with some of these modifications to the Master Cleanse orthodoxy.
Post Diet: Breaking the Fast

When are you through with the diet? Either when you reach the number of days that you planned, or alternately, when your tongue goes from “coated and fuzzy” to a clear pink color.

Burroughs outlines a gentle approach for coming off the diet without upsetting your digestive system excessively. Although Burroughs recommends that you become a practicing raw foodist vegetarian after the diet to avoid recontamination with toxic dead animal flesh, he does provide an alternative transition plan for omnivores.